Friday, March 21, 2014

The Susceptibilities & Trappings of Love

WE ARE ON THE THRESHOLD of summer. Thoughts of sun and sea and sizzling romance begin to cross some minds but then not just yet.

            With the recent Love Month, we haven’t really gotten over the traffic and the frenzy and the cheesiness and, well, okay for many, the magic brought about by this single day when we see red and all shapes are hearts. Surely you know that we’re talking about Valentine’s Day, commercially dubbed Christmas of the hearts.



        [Above photos were taken in front of St. Peter Shrine along Commonwealth Avenue on Valentine’s Day; at Centris’ EcoStore, where I met up with high school friends two days before the big day; and an all-spruced up Mall of Asia (MOA) in late January.]

            If you ask me, I myself have some kind of a hangover after a post-Valentine’s Day date with daughter Ghiselle. We watched Starting Over Again and I am just sooooooo happy to see Piolo Pascual on the big screen once more. As expected, he played the part of Marco so well and that no matter what angle, he looked perfect.


        And as many of you have witnessed, nobody else could have played Ginny better than Toni Gonzaga. She and Piolo, no doubt, have this chemistry that translates to box office hits. As I write, the movie has earned PhP400-million and it continues to be shown locally and abroad. [Photo from Piolo Jose Pascual’s Facebook page.]


        And because the movie was directed by Olivia Lamasan – In My Life, The Mistress and Milan are part of her impressive list – everyone in the cast performed superbly. No bad acting here.

            Each one can even boast of their own quotable quotes, aside from the now famous lines of Piolo as Marco ("Ano’ng karapatan mo’ng hingin ang isang bagay na pinagdamot mo’ng ibigay? I deserved an explanation. I deserved an acceptable reason …”) and Toni as Ginny ("Give me love Sir, pero kung wala talaga, how do I unlove you?")

        Iza Calzado as Patty – in her monologue that ended with I love him Ginny and in love, there is no fear" – proves that she was likewise cut out for the role.

            Ginny’s best friends Wella and Beb, played by Beauty Gonzales and Cai Cortez, respectively, have their shining moments, too. Among their many pronouncements, this one made me laugh and this should be a mantra for people who find it hard moving on: "Adik ka na naman sa pag-asa eh. Try mo kaya’ng lumaklak ng realidad."


BLAST FROM THE PAST


      This Piolo hangover brings me back to my first encounter with the actor in April 2007 during the press conference for an ABS-CBN teleserye starring him and Claudine Baretto. I was to make a First Person article on him for MOD’s April issue. It was held at Esquinita’s Roberto Antonio’s Restaurant just across ABS-CBN but I’m not sure if this resto is still there …


        I remember the day I was given the assignment by Ms. Chay, our editor. I was simply overjoyed, over-excited and over everything. I even texted my daughters about the assignment as if some major event is about to happen in my life. That evening, I was humoring daughter Ghiselle with a bunch of what-ifs – what if I get-tongue tied or suffer a mental block or ask him the wrong questions like “will you marry me?” and “can you accept me with my two daughters?” She laughed but I’m sure she was keeping herself from telling me her mom has gone truly nuts …



 

        As you can see in the photos, I made sure to sit beside him. Tonton Alcaraz (may he rest in peace), the photographer assigned for the said coverage, knew I’m such a big fan that he so generously recorded in his camera every moment of this my very first meeting with the ultimate heartthrob.


            In this encounter, I was reminded of one of Oprah’s quotable quotes: “Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.”


            Hahaha! The Drama Queen strikes again.


        So how was it? Well, it wasn’t something like he could make my panty drop or loosen my bra straps. I simply felt light and easy beside him. I realized that it’s true what they say about everything going in slow motion. He was even more good-looking in the flesh and as that song goes, I was all knocked out.


            (Okay guys, stop rolling your eyes or raising your eyebrows, just imagine I’m 16 … or if you can’t help it anymore, just check out a more mature and less insane blog.)


        I no longer remember how I completed the regular press con and, most especially, the one-on-one with him afterwards. But I definitely asked the right questions, I didn’t stutter, I was so proud of myself!


        I only remember silently melting each time he'd answer my questions and look me in the eye. It's not something like I'm the only writer he ever looked in the eye. But it's not every day that Piolo Pascual gets to look me in the eye and be that close and personal.


            I got the chance to interview him again two years later when he was launched as endorser of Blue Water Day Spa together with Marian Rivera at Crowne Plaza Hotel. And you know what, I felt exactly the same the first time I was face to face with him ...


            In this particular media launch, a Dating Game was held with lady members of media as searchies. Our Fashion stylist at that time, Zusette (below photo, second from left; also in the picture are then EAs [editorial assistants] Charity and Jhen), won and so we had the chance to join him inside a  makeshift tent set up in the hotel.


ANALYZING VALENTINE’S DAY

      Okay, let’s go back to the present but not necessarily drop the topic of love. Admit it but this topic – or some semblance of it – is irresistible, inescapable. You know what they say about it making the world go round.

            And need we say more about why commercial establishments and related enterprises make so much money on Valentine’s Day?

        This year, everyone was lured to celebrate the day and since it fell on a Friday, why not? And we mean everyone, including the single people, those who are not romantically linked or inclined.

            Ogie Alcasid even mounted a concert just for them [photo from the Ticketworld website].


        I have single girlfriends who spend Valentine’s Day together to proclaim that they don’t need to be in a relationship to celebrate.

            This is exactly what actress Andi Eigenmann wanted to emphasize in her Instagram post on that day. She said, “One day in February isn’t special. But you are.” (Photo from Jake Galvez’s Facebook account; Jake did her makeup during the recent premiere night of ABNKKBSNPLAko The Movie, an adaptation of Bob Ong’s novelty book published several years ago.)


        If you watched ABS-CBN’s Buzz ng Bayan, she clarified that it was meant for all the single girls out there and not for her rumored boyfriend Jake Ejercito, son of Manila Mayor Joseph Estrada.  

            She stressed that February 14, Valentine’s Day, is just one ordinary day that comes once a year. “You don’t have to worry about not receiving flowers or not having a Valentine that day because that’s not special,” she said. “Pero you are ... huwag mo naman isipin na sa araw na ’yun, dun ka lang makakatanggap ng something na special.”

        She has a point there. You don’t become less special just because you’re not in a relationship. You shouldn’t let yourself be defined by another person’s presence in your life.

        Talking about Valentine’s Day messages, one stands out. It’s not romantic but to me, it defines true and unconditional love. This was uttered during the February 14th episode of ABS-CBN’s It’s Showtime, while its hosts were talking to Vhong Navarro via phone patch. After the usual chit-chat, Billy Crawford, Vice Ganda and Anne Curtis chorused, “we love you Vhong” and Anne added, “no matter what.”


        No matter what – three words that says it all. It means you are loved without reservations or conditions.

            Going back to the movie Starting Over Again, those three words translate to “my love is greater than your failures,” the line delivered by Iza’s character to Piolo’s.

AFTER THE MAULIN’

      We all know that Vhong had one transgression in this whole mauling incident. Being the Mr. Suave and Totoy Bibo that he is, his ways with women is no secret but he didn’t play rapist for Deniece Cornejo.

            And that’s all I’m saying because the entire country has discussed this incident long enough.

            Let me just share with you that I cried with his It’s Showtime co-hosts when he came back to the show last week. But I am happy that his sense of humor is intact and he still got the moves!





‘FROZEN’ MOMENTS

        I spent Valentine’s Day by attending my usual Thanksgiving Mass at St. Peter Shrine then walked to Ever mall nearby. I bought myself a pair of sandals.

            As I mentioned earlier, my V date was to happen on that coming Sunday yet. This brings to mind the opening spiel of my former boss, Mr. RJ – Ramon in his Valentine’s Day shows at Bistro RJ. He would sort of congratulate the ladies in the house because their special someone is spending Valentine’s day on the exact date with them, insinuating they’re The One or not second fiddle. “Not before, not after,” he would say with a naughty smile …

        On Valentine’s night -- while waiting for daughter Ghiselle to come home from work – I watched the waxing moon for a while then settled in front of the TV to watch Frozen in my DVD player. [Photo from the movie’s Facebook page posted right after winning the Oscars for Best Animated Film.]


        Just like the rest of mankind who has seen the movie, I swooned and I was touched and I cried. And I want to say I’m more like Anna. But unlike the majority, I prefer Love Is An Open Door than Let It Go.

            I’m sure you’re up to here, too about the quotable quotes in that movie but still I want you to know my favorites are those delivered by  Olaf, the Snowman – “Some people are worth melting for,” and “love is putting someone else’s needs before you.” [Image from Disney’s website.]


        And oh I also like the first meeting of Hans and Anna, who goes, “this is awkward. Not you’re awkward, but just because we’re … I’m awkward. You’re gorgeous. Wait, what?” [Image also from Disney’s website.]


ALL-TIME FAVE FLICKS

      As if I am not feeling romantic enough – or to be more appropriate super kilig … I can’t find the exact word for kilig in English – I chanced upon a clip on YouTube.com of Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore – one of my all-time favorite movie couples – as guests on the February 26th episode of The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon. (Photo from mydailynews.com.)


        I soooo loved them in The Wedding Singer and loved them more in 50 First Dates. In both movies – just like in Frozen – the lady characters are their own person, not just out there waiting to be loved or saved …

            Even with a pregnant Drew, she and Adam looked so good together as they sang an impromptu song with host Jimmy playing the guitar.

            “Every 10 years, I promise to love you,” Drew started the song and Adam followed with “I’ll always be true, even as we get older.”

        “I will still love you when you’re 64,” Drew continued and Adam added, “I will still love you when your boobs touch the floor.”

            What made me really kilig was when Adam ended the song with “I can be the man who grows old with you,” and Drew, seemingly touched by the familiar song from their movie The Wedding Singer, puts her hands into her lips and they embraced.

        Ahwwwwww ….

THE DATING GAME

        On a lazy day the week after V Day and quite belatedly, I started asking friends on Facebook on what their ideal romantic date is. I randomly asked who were online that day.

            Inspired by some of the initial answers, I continued posing the question on more FB friends and I ended up making a legitimate survey. I asked 91 people and got answers from 66.

            Five asked for more time to answer but three never got to really do it. Yam, former colleague at MOD and now a layout artist in a book publishing firm, decided to ask four of her officemates instead. Good girl …

            High school batchmate, Dores took a day before filing his answer: “Dinner by the beach or facing the ocean. We’d take a stroll after dinner, then go to a jazz concert in a small venue like Yoshi’s Jazz Club in Oakland (California … he’s based in San Francisco) and have glasses of wine.”

            [I lifted the following photo from his Facebook page and Dores says this was taken some 30-plus years ago in a beach in New York.]


        Another three responded but no definite answers – Beijing-based Liz admits she couldn’t think of an answer; US of A-based cousin Ronan has a candid reply, “patay tayo dyan, hindi ako mahilig mag-date”; and Candy, a mother of bike racing champs, sends me a sticker.

            The rest, 25 of them, gave no answer or response whatsoever.

            The 66 respondents come from all walks of life with ages ranging from 17 to 59 – teenage college students, young and not-so-young professionals including chefs, BPO and SEO agents and managers, book illustrators, nurses, sales directors, and, of course, journalists and PR people. There were also SAHMs (stay-at-home moms) and WAHMs (work-at-home-moms) and almost senior citizens.

            There’s also a lawyer/judge, an optometrist, a curtain wall designer, an owner of a dance studio, a network marketer, a couple of self-employed entrepreneurs, a mobile bar proprietor, a part-time bar owner, real estate executives, an online English teacher, a band member, and some rich retirees.

SURVEY SAYS …

        The most number of answers was the usual dinner by candlelight with a series of variations.

            Check out the following interesting answers –

            Martin, who runs a mobile bar, leaves nothing on the details –

        “An ideal romantic date for me is setting up a three-course candlelight dinner for my girl on a beach where I personally prepare and cook her favorite dishes. The sound of the waves and the sea breeze will serve as our background music as she drinks her favorite glass of chilled Riesling and me, my favorite beer. We will spend the rest of the night together, talking about how awesome our relationship is and believing that we are truly two imperfect pieces that fit perfectly together.”

            Martin looks forward to spending not just the night but forever with long-time girlfriend Aiza (with him in photo below), who he intends to marry early next year.


        Nephew Chino, a bank yuppie who dabbles in photography, tabulates his romantic date –

            “It consists of 1. (An) evening dinner by the beach. 2. With the girl I love most. 3. Meaningful conversations and a few good laughs.”

            [The following photo is one of Chino’s profile pics in his Facebook page … and being hot runs in the family.]


        I didn’t spare my daughters from this survey even if I had to literally badger them into answering ...

        Daughter Ghiselle, a curtainwall designer, wants dinner served in the middle of the ocean with the water so clear, she and her date can see colorful fishes swimming about. She tells me that she has yet to do this but if you ask me, her recent date with the gentle giant butanding in Oslob, Cebu could be one heavy romantic date.


        Daughter Pee Ann, a chef, on the other hand, would like “a candlelight dinner while riding a hot air balloon.” Just like the other daughter, this is for a future date. She adds that she enjoys all her dates – usually buffet dinner – with boyfriend and fellow chef, Alex, including their latest one as shown in the following photo to celebrate Alex’s birthday and Valentine’s Day as well.


        Niece Rica [in photo with boyfriend Mad], a call center executive, answered with “ang hirap naman ng question,” and then said, “a simple date, probably lunch in a nice restaurant … nothing complicated.!”


        Nel [shown below with his special someone], a band member and part-owner of Black Kings’ Bar along West Avenue in Quezon City with a day job at an SEO, also opts for simplicity. “Simple lang at walang masyadong borloloy na nagmumukhang OA.” He elaborates on this simple date as “intimate, (with) a home-cooked meal for two and romantic music playing in the background.”



        Couple Bob and Camille – both based in Dubai, Bob as a DJ in a local radio station; Camille as sales administrator in a service provider company – seem to fancy heights when going on a dinner date.

           

            Bob wants it on a cliff similar to where celebrity couple Drew Arellano and Iya Vilania got married in Batangas last month; Camille, in Cloud 9 in Antipolo City.


            Camille recalls a date they had in Cloud 9 several years back. “A band came to us, asked what song we wanted to hear, and serenaded us with the song Ikaw Lang Ang Aking Mahal by VST & Company,” she recalls. “The date was special because of the good food, the acoustic music and the view overlooking the city below.”




        Nephew JP, a sales representative of Hyundai, also wants a dinner date overlooking the city lights. “An acoustic band will complete the romantic ambience,” he adds. With him in photo is his very talented daughter Larah.




NATURE’S COURSE

        Next in the majority answers was a beach getaway and communing with nature.

            Other replies included a day of adventure while quite a few named particular places they would want to visit.

            Niece Fiona, who bakes delicious cupcakes and works as strategy research assistant for an Australian SEO, is one of those adventurous romantics or romantic adventurers.  “I don’t like the usual movie plus dinner date, I would rather experience new things with the other person,” she declares.

            “I want to go to a place I’ve never seen before,” she continues, “doing things I haven’t done before; a day that would make me feel inspired and alive.”

        Last Valentine’s, she and husband Puroy did just that and went to Sagada up north, as seen in the photo below.


        From freelance writer Ana: “My ideal date is just the two of us having fun. Be it, say, mountain climbing or scuba diving, that sort of stuff. But since you said romantic, gusto ko pa din ng  getaway, kami’ng dalawa lang somewhere in Palawan, not Boracay.”

            Here she’s shown amidst the cherry blossoms of Korea.


            Judge Lani of the Paranaque MTC (Metropolitan Trial Court) wants “a long drive to San Benito Farm and spend a relaxing healthy day with the guy … massage, sauna, the works and dinner consists of fruits and vegetables and white wine.”

            The guy she’s referring to is husband Erwin and they make a good-looking couple in the photo below.


            New York-based cousin and SAHM Winnie says: “Walking around Central Park holding hands. We will ride a carousel and after that, spread out a picnic blanket and have lunch together.”


            Winnie adds, “I love taking care of my family” and together they have joined the Filipino Rosary Group there. Too bad, I’m finding it hard uploading pictures from her Facebook page except this latest post of hers – a selfie.



        High school friend Mirella, who owns the House of Dance, with studios in BF Homes and Tomas Morato, both in Quezon City, recalls her most romantic date: “Looking out into the sunset or sunrise together from the poolside restaurant of the Philippine Plaza, now called the Sofitel Hotel.

            Mirella shares the following photos with husband Monch, taken during their 25th wedding anniversary; and a current one with their two daughters, Clarissa May and Kimberly Ann.


        Nephew Ronald, a licensed teacher who runs a small business including tutoring, has a poetic answer: “Nature always touches the heart and this is possible on a cruise, complete with flowers, a glass of wine, and enchanting music.”

            The following family picture shows Ronald with wife Emily, daughter Audrey Rose and son Roi Emerson.


        Single girl and doting aunt Bambi likewise wants her date on a cruise. She explains why: “On a cruise, it means just the two of you, solo n’yo mundo, wala’ng istorbo, wala’ng stress … pwede mag-usap ng mga plano at mas makakapag-isip ng tama habang tinitignan mo ‘yung agos sa dagat at lalo’ng lumalalim yung love n’yo for each other.”


        Laissa [in photo with son Nathan], a cool mom and works as a software QA engineer, gives us a glimpse of her kind of date: “It would have to be with a touch of nature, probably in an open field or park or in the beach. We’ll have a picnic mat, some candles and wine. We would simply watch the world go by – the sea or the moon and the stars – and then we will hold hands and look into each other’s eyes without any words spoken.”


NEITHER TIME NOR SPACE

      And there were those who specified neither time nor space.

            Melan, a call center agent, declares: “Kahit saan at kahit ano’ng klase pang date, any kind of surprise will make it special and romantic.” [Photo shows him wearing a cool headgear.]


        Newlywed and Singapore-based Felnes, who works with Procter & Gamble as purchasing manager, didn’t say it in so many words but she also wants to be surprised. “But what makes an ideal romantic date is your partner’s undivided attention during the whole time that you’re together,” she says. “Not checking his phone or doing work and we are practically talking about anything and everything … it doesn’t matter where our date is as long as I have his full attention and he offers a good conversation.”

            Photo shows Felnes with husband Mike – endearly called Jengjeng by family and close friends.


        Friend and business partner Leah reveals that what’s important is “a sensible and masayahin na ka-date.” AJ, an ex-PR girl now connected with SMDC International Sales, says “a lively conversation” is all it takes for a date to become ideal and romantic.

            Jenny, media relations officer of Visions & Expressions, Inc., says “a romantic date means undivided attention, no phone calls, wala’ng abala, focus on each other … ‘yan very romantic na for me and I wish I will have that one day.”

            [Photo shows Jenny with her family, namely daughter Shekinah Patricia; husband Alex; and sons Gabe and Neil Justin.]


HAPPY TOGETHER

        Quite a few stressed that it’s not the date per se but more on the person you are with. Among them, daughter Pee Ann’s boyfriend, Alex (“basta kasama yung gustong makasama …”); friend Roanne from F. Jacinto Group days (“naku sister, wala ako’ng ganyan ... as long as you are with the person you want to be with … pag di kasi kayo nag-click, flop siya …”); niece Jam, 17 (“hindi naman puro dinner, pwede ring mamasyal lang o punta sa theme park … as long as nag-e-enjoy kayo’ng dalawa magiging special at ideal ang date.”); and Nel’s mom, Ellen, (“as long as ‘yung kasama mo is someone who puts a smile on your face and makes you kilig …”).

        My high school BFF Edna – endearly called Lola Ganda by her grandchildren – says that the dinner date need not be in a fancy restaurant. “A place where you can eat and chat, any place basta you are together,” she says.

            She also shares the following photo with husband Jun with the caption, “This is what I call a romantic date - on the sidewalk having a taste of Korean street food.”


A FOR EFFORT

        Jezza, who used to be MOD’s EA and now network marketer, says that a romantic date is something planned by the guy himself. “Usually kasi, most boyfriends let their girlfriends decide kung saan nila gusto, iba kasi yung feeling kapag nag-effort yung guy.”


        Apple, another ex-EA of MOD and now pre-school teacher and my business partner in thethirdpartyplanners, likewise puts a high score on a date’s effort. Aside from a romantic place complete with conducive background music, she adds that there should be fireworks …

            My jetsetter of a cousin, Rose [below photo, taken in Maryland], relates her most romantic date: “My date took me to a nice lunch in a cozy French restaurant with a working fireplace located on top of a hill and overlooking the ocean (Santa Monica, California). He arranged for the chef to serve our meal (he just happened to know the owner and the chef!) then he took me to watch the circus in Long Beach, California with the Ringling Bros and Barnum & Bailey. Then we went to the museum and he was so familiar with the arts and I was super impressed. We had coffee afterwards and strolled at the park until late night.”

        She tells me, however, that despite being impressed, she didn’t end up being together with that date. “He is too possessive …” she reveals.


CREATIVE, SPONTANEOUS

        Jackie, another MOD’s former EAs and now a WAHM, comes up with a creative romantic date: “Sa theme park kasi madaming ‘get close’ moments. There are activities that give one another a glimpse of each other’s personality. Plus ang mga horror houses and thrill rides reinforce a bond between the couple. There’s a study based on that. Of course, the usual hatid-sundo, preferably by car; a mini gift, something the girl has mentioned in one of their conversations before the date – which shows he’s been listening and attentive. While on the date, he opens doors for her, pulls a chair when dining out, escorts her while crossing the street or going downstairs. Guy should be spontaneous and if they can talk and laugh about a lot of things during the date, that’s romantic and scores high on the kilig meter.”

            Here’s Jackie in an MRT ride …


        Call center agent Ferdie contributes: “An ideal romantic date for me would be something spontaneous, not too formal and fun most of all. I remember having this dinner date somewhere within the Malate area. We decided to visit this very fancy restaurant at the spur of the moment. Food was great and all but it took a bit long to prepare. While waiting for our chosen entrée, we spotted this fishball cart just outside the premises. Me and my girl looked at each other and that was all it took for us to run through the door, giggling like two idiots that we were, and made our tusok-tusok like there was no tomorrow and had the most awesome appetizer in a fancy meal ever. That’s gotta be the most fun I have ever had in a date. It was romantic in a retarded kind of way.”


        Ferdie says he and Jam are no longer together but they have the above photo to show for it. They remain good friends.

            Cousin Tito, Megaworld’s sales director, starts his date the usual way, a movie and dinner in his favorite shabu-shabu restaurant. How he ends it makes the date special. He says, “an unexpected long drive to Clark (Air Base) or Pangasinan kahit wala’ng damit na dala.”

            Tito’s wife Leah, also a sales director but this time of Robinson’s Land Corporation, specifies a cruise aboard a yacht along Manila Bay is her kind of romantic. She adds, “cruising while watching the sunset” and then dinner and, of course, share a few drinks of San Mig light after.”

            The couple looks good together while attending a beach wedding …


                Childhood friend Junie says: “My idea of a romantic date is something that is unexpected, something that your partner doesn’t expect. Doesn’t need to be expensive, only sweet. Or maybe fulfilling one of your partner’s dreams. And roses always makes it romantic.”

FAMILY GALS

      Some of the married people answered with the family in mind.

            Mother of three with a lovely pair of twins, Luchie reveals that when her husband and she were boyfriend-girlfriend yet, a date would be a Valentine concert and dinner. “Now that we’re parents, we simply enjoy lunch or dinner out,” she says. “Last time, it was lunch to avoid traffic and stress and we spent dinner with the kids and had a park visit and picnic the next day.”

            Jenneth, an online English teacher for a Korean company, says: “I like to go to the park and have a picnic with my family. I will prepare all our snacks and we will eat together, play together, laugh together. I would also like to receive flowers from the husband while saying ‘I love you forever’ to me. The kids will do the same thing, not necessarily with flowers but a card will do.”

        Jenneth is shown below with husband Sherwin and (lower photo) in a bonding moment with their sons Julio Roderick and Stephen John.



JUST BECAUSE …

      And then there were those answers which appear mundane but when you come to think of it, they’re sweet without sounding like a well-executed scene from a movie.

            Read such answers from my high school friends Ruby, Cynthia and Joyce –

        Ruby, executive assistant to the President of Vitarich Corporation, says: “Eating karyoka and fish balls at the UP Sunken Garden while watching and okray-ing runners around the oval.”

            [Photo shows Ruby with husband Rico and their granddaughter Angel Elise.]




        Cynthia, formerly with the National Security Council but has since joined her daughter in Canada, intimates: “Walking two rounds at the Quezon City Memorial Circle and eating nilagang mani then having a quiet dinner at home na may kasama’ng red wine habang may soft romantic music na background sabay bolahan … LOL.”

            And Cynthia has a souvenir photo of such date but her companion is camera-shy....


        Joyce, an optometrist and realtor based in San Francisco, CA, quips: “Playing footsies on a Friday night with the hubby after 30 years of marriage.” The hubby’s name is Oscar and their photo was taken a few weeks ago in Baguio City during their visit in Manila.


        And then there’s more – from two ladies named Ellen.

            The first is a friend from my F. Jacinto Group days and currently based in Canada, where she works as supervisor in a coffee shop. She says: “Watching a movie at home with the husband on the couch while holding hands …”

        The husband is another friend from F. Jacinto Group, Joel, a nurse, and they are seen together in the following photo while on a trip to Tres Rios Hacienda in Cancun, Mexico in October last year.


        The second is my sister-in-law. She actually asked in a text message her husband, my brother Boyet, who was then in Surigao, about my question because she couldn’t think of a particular date they had. This was his answer: “Ano’ng hindi tayo nagde-date ... yung labas natin dalawa sa mall at sa palengke, date na ‘yun.”

            How he ends his text message – “just landed in Surigao airport … love u 4 4 …” makes it a valid answer. For the unknowing, “4 4” means “very much.”

            This photo of Boyet and Ellen together was taken during our family summer get-together in 2012. They are such a sweet couple, even if it doesn’t show, calling each other “my love.”



        New York-based cousin and SAHM Winnie says: “Walking around Central Park holding hands. We will ride a carousel and after that, spread out a picnic blanket and have lunch together.”


            Winnie adds, “I love taking care of my family” and together they have joined the Filipino Rosary Group there. Too bad, I’m finding it hard uploading pictures from her Facebook page except this latest post of hers – a selfie.


 THE WHOLE CLICHE


      Finally, there were answers which include all the traditional candles and petals on the floor, which Mark, a working student currently taking up his Masters in Information Technology at the PUP (Polytechnic University of the Philippines) Open University, calls “the whole cliché as all girls love.”



            Here’s what he means. “It would be an al fresco dinner, a five-course meal in one of the amazing hole-in-the-wall restaurants so it will be a bit obscure and private. As soon as she arrives, the strings will then be played, other people in the resto will slowly leave for hint of providing privacy, and I will be waiting by the dinner table with three dozen pink roses peeking at my back. Dinner will then be served and afterwards, some slow dancing to cap the night.”

        If you can’t quite place Mark’s date scenario, it’s a scene from that romantic flick in the 80s, Got To Believe, starring the late Rico Yan and Claudine Barretto.

            Princess, a 23-year old book illustrator, wants her romantic date “fantasy-ish.” She says the setting must be something like the Fernwood Gardens in Quezon City but there should be a river somewhere because she wants that her date and she will ride a boat – with tiny lights around it like Christmas-y lights reminiscent of that scene from Disney’s animated movieTangled – in going to the venue where they will have dinner. “While on the boat, there will be talk about happy things,” she continues. “Petals are strewn on the path towards the dining area and my favorite foods should be served. A violinist will play our background music to which we will slow-dance to after dinner. And there should be lots of pictures – para’ng pre-nup style – to preserve the memorable night.”

            Last but not the least, cousin Melody, who works as tax coordinator in a CPA firm in New York, likewise wants “the works” for her date: “Hydro spa hot tub, lit candles, strawberry and champagne snack” or “a hot air balloon ride over waterfalls.” She reveals that she has done both except that the hot air balloon wasn’t over waterfalls. That means she has something to look forward to …


***

            Wow, I got carried away there and I was really blown away and genuinely touched by many of the answers.

        After all this surveying and polling, can we discern true love in one romantic date? With all our susceptibilities to fall in love and all the trappings that go with it, what is love actually?

            Well, going back to the poll responses, love is making an effort as well as being spontaneous. It is going through “the works” as much as being simple. It is straightforward but it could also be interestingly complicated. It is making an impression as well as showing that “take me for what I am” stance.

            Once more, thank you for indulging me in this crazy survey. I feel that you enjoyed sharing your thoughts even if some of you answered quite absent-mindedly.

            Congratulations to those whose dates are already a remarkable memory. For those waiting for it to happen, I wish you the best romantic date ever.

            In the meantime, believe that anything is possible in the dating game and in love …

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