Stories of Love

or the Lack of It

IN THE SPIRIT of Valentine’s Month, I am reprinting the following three articles. They may have been written a couple of years ago but the message they bring remains relevant today. They may not be the best of love stories but they happened in real life.

Published in MOD Magazine

A Story That Must Be Told

July 2010 issue

www.mod.com.ph

“There’s no way you could tell that the man you fall in love with

is Mr. Right,” Aga Estrellado tells MOD. “Pag mahal mo, mahal mo

talaga even if it isn’t in your plans to get hurt.”

Aga’s story was revealed during the launch

of this year’s Avon Speak Out Against Domestic

Violence Campaign. She told her story outright – no

assumed names, no fiction circumstances – and by

doing so, Aga hopes to inspire, if not embolden

the nameless and faceless women who continue to speak

out, seek help, and be empowered.

1

 ‘Violence will no longer visit me’

As told to Lulu Reclusado-Nario

            I was a victim of domestic violence. Hopeless and helpless, I considered myself the lowest living thing on earth.

            Today, by the grace of God, I wake up each morning no longer scared of being hit. No more physical abuse or violence on me or on my family.

            Today, I am empowered because I made a decision to be happy and not let anybody – even the person I so dearly loved – to hurt me physically and, more important, to chip away the very core of my being and take away my dignity.

Yesterday is definitely a thing of the past, but let me share with you how I saw stars not because I was so in love. Let me impart to you not the violins I heard in my young romance but painful ringing in my ears because of rough hands landing on my face in a moment of rage.

            I was 18 years old when I met and fell super-duper in love with Andres. He was tall, and the girls in school simply swooned over him. He chose me to be his girl and I gave him my love to the max!

            I got pregnant and we got married in July 1996. Right after I gave birth, my happily ever after abruptly ended.

            You see, every time he got mad – and many times, for no reason at all – he slapped my face, twisted my arm, and hit me over and over again, the blows landing on various parts of my body. One time, riding his motorcycle, he ran me over, hurting my foot.

            There wasn’t a day when I didn’t have a bruise on my face or a lump in my body. He threw anything at me – a kitchen utensil, an appliance – and punctuated the blows with an unending stream of insults. He was terrifying whenever he got mad.

After the violence, however, he felt so sorry he often knelt to ask for my forgiveness. And each time, I took his remorse to be genuine and, yes, I forgave him. I comforted myself, thinking he was still my husband and the father of my kids. And don’t they say that blessed are those who forgive?

            But after receiving forgiveness, the moment he got angry, he hit me again and it got more painful each time. My kids begged me that we escape. “Mom, why do you have to put up with this?” they cried.

            I didn’t know what to do and I didn’t want to go anywhere because despite everything, I still loved him. I kept hoping he would change.

            I suffered through it all, until on the eighth year of our marriage, I finally came to my senses. On October 2001, while Andres was in his office, I gathered my kids and we left the house. We went to my parents’ place and we lived with them. I then continued my college studies.

            But Andres came and demanded that we go back to him. I refused but he continued to come often, terrifying us.

            One day, he aimed a knife at me and said he was going to kill me.

            Horrified, I finally found the courage to file a criminal case against him. I then felt some semblance of strength and I thought he won’t be able to touch me again.

            I was wrong. He came to say sorry and promised to seek counselling. My heart softened. And I did not just forgive him, I also dropped the case I filed against him.

I would learn later that that was the most stupid thing I’ve ever done.

            One day, while I was preparing to leave for school, Andres arrived with a glass bowl in his hand. I thought he was giving us a dish of dinner. But I saw that all too familiar madness in his eyes. Without warning, he hit me with the bowl, banged my head on the wall, and started kicking and punching me every which way.

            Hearing the commotion, my mother and my kids came to help me, but Andres turned to my mother and started hitting her!

            That was it. I knew then I had to put an end to all of these. And I promised to myself I would.

            I realized my real problem was not my husband. The problem was me and my low self-worth which led me to think I needed a man in my life – even if that man treated me like a doormat.

I brought my family to my neighbor’s house and for the first time in my life, I decided to seek help. I went to the Family Court and filed for the annulment of our marriage.

            It used to be that I didn’t have any confidence in myself. I thought there wasn’t any place for me to go if I left my husband. I was scared that my children and I won’t be able to live without him.

            Today, I am happy and empowered. I am no longer a victim but a survivor of domestic violence. I have a brand-new life with my children, who are now teenagers.

            I wake up each morning without fear of violence. I am now a teacher and I also have some small businesses – a computer shop and a small grocery.

            I have also found a new love – an Australian businessman. And we’ve been together for four years now.

            Despite this new love, I sometimes feel I might get hurt again. But I’m stronger now. I am aware of my rights and I know what to do in case violence shows its ugly head once more.

            Still, I am confident it will never happen again. Only because I will not let it.

                                                             __________________________ 

Published in Spiff Magazine

January 2008

2

A Virgin Makes It

On the Floor

As told to LOTUS

IT’S a lazy Saturday afternoon and Jamin*, who just turned two the other day, goes around my parents’ lawn with his trike. He waves at me now and then shouting his most beautiful word, for now, “Mommy!”

            He is such a darling and each of his growing days makes him look more and more like his father. It’s just too bad his look-alike won’t be around to witness this phenomenon.

 A SHORT-LIVED FAIRY TALE

            Two years ago, Jamin came into my life quite unexpectedly. He was part of an unfolding fairy tale. It’s just that it didn’t last happily ever after. Thank God, however, because memories do endure.

            While the relationship was short-lived, I am thankful that it had awesome results. I refuse to be considered just a statistic in the growing number of single mothers in the call center industry. But I am proud to be part of those brave women who never considered abortion, which, alarmingly, is becoming a favored option.

MS. 2Ps MEETS LADIES’ MAN

            The first time I set foot on The Floor, I was mesmerized. The Floor was enormous, bustling with activity, buzzling with calls, calls – and more calls. It is the Operations Floor where agents and representatives take and make calls.

            I met Jake* – now 25 years old – the father of my child, in the first call center that I worked for. He is very much like the ‘tall, dark and handsome’ kind of guy. When I first laid eyes on him on The Floor, I was suddenly smitten.

            He was popular because he is really good-looking and he gave the impression of a ladies’ man, always rushing, never really satisfied. Frequenting the bars nearby was an escape for him. And so with getting into instant relationships. He was too busy to pause even for a moment to the point that relationships must be had like instant coffee from a Vendo machine. If you want to dirty dance and hang out after that then you’re the girl!

            I am a mild-mannered girl – I’m now 24 years old – that my friends call me Ms. 2Ps as in Ms. Prim and Proper. They drink, smoke and really go wild in a party but I don’t. Well, when I became an agent, that was the only time I learned to drink, smoke but remained prim and proper even in bars and parties. I hang out with them because despite these differences, our

friendship goes a long way and we accept each other for what we are.

            I don’t dirty dance and all I want to do after an unforgiving night shift is go home and sleep. And I have yet to experience my first love or even a relationship and everything else romantic and sexual that goes with it.

            Definitely, I cannot pass for Jake’s girl – or so I thought.

A LIFE-CHANGING YULE PARTY

            Then the call center’s Christmas party happened and changed my life forever. During that fateful night, I surprised even myself as I swayed to the pulsating beat of Earth, Wind & Fire. I never imagined I would be dirty dancing with the man of my dreams. But then nobody knows – even my friends from the call center – how long I’ve imagined this particular scene in my mind.

            When Jake sought me out from the crowd and led me to the dance floor, I was happiness personified. My heart was bursting with joy as I said to myself, ‘this is it!’ Just like magnet, my body radiated to the rhythm of his body. His hand found its way to my waist, the other clasped on my right hand and our eyes locked.

            After that first dance, we became inseparable until the morning sun showed up in the horizon.

SPONTANEOUS, UNPLANNED

            My friends were ecstatic. Finally, they thought, their friend is going to have an adult relationship. Of course, I was even more ecstatic to say the least. I found my Prince Charming and I vowed never to lose him!

            A week after the party, we found ourselves alone in our Team Leader’s cubicle after a shift and everyone has gone home. He started to kiss me long and hard and my knees turned jelly. I gave in to his advances and, shamelessly, embraced him in wild abandon. And we did it on The Floor as if there is honor in it.

            Our relationship became so spontaneous, unplanned and I cherished every moment. Every chance we got, we did it. I was letting him make wild love to me as if there was no tomorrow and in very unlikely places. I simply threw my scruples into the air and blindly did whatever Jake wanted.

            I couldn’t be disturbed with my newfound happiness. I even found it convenient to ignore my friends’ advice to slow down. Worse, I took for granted the warnings of people who knew Jake inside out about his being an incurable playboy. They called me ‘his next victim’ but I didn’t care because I chose to walk into him as an easy and very willing prey.

            I wished to God that my overwhelming love for him would make him stay and stay for good. Even if the rest of the world knew for sure that ‘stay’ was never in his vocabulary.

PRINCE CHARMING ACTUALLY A FROG

            Four months into the relationship, I started feeling strange physically until I missed my period once too many. About the same time, Jake begun to act weird himself. He stopped seeing me, saying he can’t go on break, has to go home right away or some other reason much too trivial.

            And then it dawned on me – he is not going to stay after all. He probably got what he wanted and he’s out of my life. That my Prince Charming is actually a frog.

            My waking hours were spent trying to figure out when did I lose his love – or lust or attention or whatever it was that made him hang around me. Was it in between the irate callers, the midnight coffee breaks or the fiery lovemaking?

THE WORLD CAVES IN

            I stopped asking when word got to me that he’s been seen in some place with some girl…I also opted not to tell him. I didn’t want to give him this advantage over me. I have been such a fool and, for the times I was hurting, went to the extent of calling myself a slut.

            And the world caved in on me or was that an explosion? I didn’t know what to do, feel or think. I couldn’t even listen to my heart because it was in shreds. I also became very scared. There’s a child inside me and nobody knows – even the man I created it with. And I’m ashamed to tell my friends. I cannot even shock my parents by bringing out the garbage, I don’t want to shock them with an unexpected pregnancy.

PICKING UP THE PIECES

            On my own, I chose not to dwell on whatever regrets or disappointments or revolting emotions I initially felt all at the same time. I just had to pick up the pieces, deal with it and move on. I am keeping the baby – with or without anybody’s approval. And for the first time in my life, I acknowledged the presence of a God and prayed for strength.

            And so I waited until it was physically obvious to tell my friends. I didn’t inform my parents. My being a call center agent became the perfect excuse for me to just get a flat nearby so that they‘d stop worrying about me having to leave the house after midnight to go to work.

            Because I had to fend for myself and the growing baby inside me, I couldn’t resign from work and had to live with bumping into Jake on the floor, in the lounge, in the elevator. Seeing him doesn’t hurt but feeling his indifference kills me each time.

            And then truth caught up with me. Surprisingly, my family was very understanding. My mother was crying the whole time and I know that my father was trying so hard not to hit me for being so stupid.

EACH DAY IS WORTH LIVING

            Today, Jamin is such a delight and he has become a source of unexplained joy to my parents, he being their first grandchild.

            I still work in a call center – although I have resigned from where I met Jake and he remains employed there – because despite the difficult hours, the pay ensures my son’s future. And despite what happened to me, each day is worth living. Jamin makes it so. That is what matters to me now.       

            A child is God’s way of telling us that the world will go on. We have no right to interfere with that.

*Names have been changed

to protect the innocent

and family’s privacy

                                                 ____________________________  

Published in MOD Magazine

A Story That Must Be Told

May 2010 Issue

3

‘I Fell In Love With My Gay Bestie’

As told to LULU RECLUSADO-NARIO

I SCREAMED like there was no tomorrow. I screamed because the scene was so piercingly painful – as if somebody stabbed me right through my heart.

            When I was done with the respiratory exercise, I saw Perry in front of me in his boxer shorts, holding his pants as if it was his dear life. Guilty as sin, he told me straight in the eye, “I’m sorry.”

            And Nico, my beloved Nico, was nowhere in sight!

            This scene, which happened five years ago, still visits my memory every now and then. There would be tears in my eyes every single time. And there would be that pain not just in my heart but my entire being.

            Five years ago, I lost not just my lover but also my best friend. I’m such a cliché, I know.

          Nico and I started out as buddies while in our sophomore year in college. We shared the dream of becoming consultant dieticians and working for the country’s biggest spa resort.

            We were part of a seven-member barkada which also includes Jill, Marla, Michelle, Perry and Ruben but Nico and I are closest. We liked the same bands, played in the same tennis team, loved shopping for clothes and accessories, and we even had matching haircuts – mine, a short pixie; his, a barber’s cut. And oh, we have the same pair of Chuck Taylors – mine, light violet; his, dark blue.

            Sometimes our friends teased us and asked something like, haven’t we developed into something romantic yet? I simply replied, “Para lang kaming Batman and Robin.”

          We also loved each other’s company that even if we were with the group, we found a space all to ourselves and talked or simply were quiet together. And we didn’t have secrets – he told me what he did one summer vacation when he went to this honky-tonk bar in the province, and I practically described to him how I lost my virginity.

            Until that trip to Tagaytay and we lost the barkada’s convoy. We ended up in Picnic Grove and all too suddenly, we found each other kissing with Taal Volacano as the only witness. To make the story short, we became ‘us’ with that kiss. It’s as if we were just waiting for this to happen – for the barkada to get scarce so that we could concentrate on falling in love. It was so fast that when everybody saw our romantic body language, they all cheered. Finally, they said

we were no longer just Batman and Robin.

            And Perry had this to say, “How nice that our barkada now has a love team.” At the time, that statement seemed so innocent. Now I know he was being sarcastic.

          My bliss with Nico lasted for three and a half years. We did elevate our friendship to the next level and this was spiced up with good sex. Or to be more appropriate, with great lovemaking. He was such a man and a real gentleman.

            The weird thing is we didn’t go through the process of falling apart. We didn’t experience either going through the motions as couples usually do after being together for so long.

            We were simply great and the envy of every couple in school.

            Up until that single moment when I witnessed through my very eyes Nico with Perry in a revealing act that only gay lovers do!

            Until now, that memory hurts as much as the first time it happened. Call me nuts, but I still love the guy. He was so sweet. He was always watching over me – and if you must know, our theme song was Someone to Watch Over Me and we specifically liked the version of Sting. I never wondered why Sting.

            And Nico was always fussing over me.

            Now wait a minute, only mothers make a fuss! Oh God. How could I have not noticed?

            Nico is now is Singapore, and living the dream of a dietician for a spa resort. Perry is with him. We never got to talk after that painful incident. Perhaps words are better left unsaid.

          Except for Nico and Perry – we now call them the dynamic duo … we were Batman and Robin, remember? – the barkada is still together, now all gainfully employed and also living our dreams.

            As I said, I still love Nico but if I should fall for someone else, I’d feel safe with a really bad guy with tattoos and some piercings. He’ll surely not fuss but will probably be fun!

MY YEARENDER

In Their Words & In Their Deeds

WOW, THAT WAS FAST! Suddenly, it is 2012 and, in fact, more than two weeks have passed.

        And as we warm up to the new year, there is just so much happening already. This is as if to jolt us back to reality after having fun, making memories, and simply gaining unwanted weight with all those holiday partying.

        As our kababayans in the cities of Cagayan de Oro and Iligan slowly get over the fury of typhoon Sendong and try to get on with their lives, low pressure areas loom in the horizon and the threat of flashfloods and landslides remain.

        A tetanus watch has been declared by the Department of Health (DOH) as an offshoot of what Dr. Eric Tayag called the deadliest New Year's Eve ever.

        The Revilla family feud is far from over with a hot video of Ramgen Revilla and girlfriend Janelle now showing on the Internet; while the wonder of PhotoShop takes center stage once more as the covers of Preview  and Mega magazines show “totally different” Charice and Jinkie Pacquiao, respectively. 

       
       The Senate has started its own teleserye which they call the Corona impeachment trial as Pasig Congressman Roman Romulo and Valenzuela City Councilor Shalani Soledad make a slight change in their lakeside wedding this Sunday to donate part of their reception budget to the victims of Sendong .

        Next year, 2013, being an election year, President Noynoy reveals in

an interview over ANC, ABS-CBN's news channel, his senatorial slate that includes Risa Hontiveros and Sonny Trillanes, among others.

        The bachelor leader of the land continues to be chided, criticized and censured for a variety of reasons, most recent of which is his search for a replacement of the Chief Justice whose impeachment trial has yet to be concluded in the Senate.

        The Department of Tourism (DOT) makes yet another controversial marketing slogan, proving that kibitzing, speaking one’s mind out and opinionating are indeed more fun in the Philippines.

        And the list of happenings and come what may is endless, truly an indication that 2012 is going to be exciting, entertaining but also enervating.

One Last Look

        But before I dwell on the new year, let me just take one last look at 2011. The year definitely chalked up some of the worst disasters and tragedies to hit the country as well as the best moments in Philippine history, highlighting the Filipino’s talent as well as strength of spirit and character.

        Sendong alone is enough for us to be thankful 2011 is over and done with. There was no sexy but scared Christine Reyes stranded on the roof but the December typhoon has overtaken Ondoy in terms of devastation and death.

        We all know how difficult Christmas has been for the victims. There were no decorated trees and blinking lights in their houses, no kids caroling on the streets, and the malls were next to empty. Many spent Christ's birthday lining up for a packed lunch, waiting it up and contemplating their future in some cold evacuation center, and worst of all, grieving not just 

homelessness but the loss of a loved one.

    Image source page. http://www.csmonitor.com

        But God practices justice and equilibrium and compensated us with precious moments and inspiring achievements to make us realize that this world was never meant to be a place of hurt.

        In retrospect, I would like to talk about my kind of people in 2011. In their words and in their deeds, they have made the just concluded year truly inspiring for me and from whom many lessons were learned.

Pride Without Prejudice

Amazing Race. First on my list are my kababayans , who make me feel good being part of this amazing Filipino race. 

        Their resilience is commendable and my favorite comedian Vic Sotto could not have been more correct when he proclaimed in an interview that “ang Pinoy naman babangon at babangon 'yan,” as the rest of us discover how hardly hit Eastern Mindanao was by Sendong. Nothing or no one can simply put us down.

        Another thing that makes me truly proud about being a Filipino is the way we spontaneously help each other in times of real trouble; or rally collectively to champion the Filipino cause – be it a beauty pageant or praying for the canonization of a saint among us.

        Again we cite the typhoons we have experienced in 2011, including Pedring and Quiel. All this time, we did not hesitate or falter in showing our deep concern for each other.

         Presently, Sendong continues to make itself felt through families who have lost a parent or a child; through empty spaces where once stood a happy home; and through mothers and young kids traumatized by the rampaging waters that changed their lives forever.   

         But in the midst of this great grief are their kababayans continuing to give support in cash and in kind. This sad incident in our Filipino life has made us solid in more ways than one. Regardless of religion and status in life, each one did – and continues to do – his/her share in providing physical comfort, easing the pain, and giving hope that this tragedy will soon pass and we will all be the better for it.

God’s Groupies. From this amazing Filipino race, I would like to zero in on the men and women of Cottolengo Filipino, an organization located in the rolling hills of Montalban, Rizal.

        This is a shelter for neglected and abandoned physically challenged children run by the Congregation of the Sons of Divine Providence, led by Fr. Julio Cuesta Ortega.

        The Italian priest tells us one incident when kids in the neighborhood called him “Amerikano,” to which he answered with candor, “hindi, Filipino ako.”

        Considering the genuine love he has for the kids of Cottolengo Filipino, Fr. Julio was telling the truth, he is totally Filipino.

        Let me first tell you that I salute all the other organizations here in the country helping out the less fortunate, most especially the children. But Cottolengo Filipino is in my list and obviously close to my heart because my batch at UST High School and I have come to personally know the organization’s devoted staff who take care of the kids as well as the Board of Trustees who, despite their busy schedule, make sure the kids are well taken care of.

COTTOLENGO Filipino, led by Fr. Julio Cuesta Ortega (above photo, middle),  finds a true friend in USTHS Batch 71 Alumni Association with Sonny Marquez (above photo, right) as president. Both are shown with Marie Estanislao, batchmate Joyce Rodriguez-Estanislao's daughter and emissary of goodness. Marie hands over a cash donation in behalf of her mom. Below photo shows members of my high school batch with Fr. Julio after a successful fund-raising dance concert performed for free by the House of Dance, owned and managed by batchmate Mirella Gotangco-Clarete (seated, left).

        I likewise salute my high school batchmates for sort of officially making Cottolengo Filipino our advocacy in 2011 and, of course, this will continue for as long as we can. I am proud to let you know that we didn’t just donate cash or other things that the kids needed. We actually bonded with them and through their gibberish talk and sometimes painfully tight grip, they make us fully understand that we are now friends with them. Their smiles tell us they enjoy being with us.

        To cap the year 2011, we had a fund-raising dance concert, performed free by the House of Dance, owned and managed by batchmate Mirella Gotangco-Clarete. The kids themselves watched the said event and this will be the subject of another blog.

        Kahlil Gibran once said, “you give but little when you give of your possessions … it is when you give of yourself that you truly give.”

        Well, I am proud to say that aside from the men and women of Cottolengo Filipino, the USTHS Batch 71 Alumni Association truly gives.

The Main Man. Manny Pacquiao is one of my favorite persons. Whatever he says or does always has an impact on people.

        The mere act of watching a football game with wife Jinkie would cause David Beckham to play more than the stipulated time in his contract during a game of his team LA Galaxy against our own Azkals last December just to impress him.  

     “I saw him walk in and I wanted to play in front of him … and I wanted to play good.”  These were his words to Dyan Castillejo during an interview with ABS-CBN’s TV Patrol. We all know that he also gave his shirt to Manny after the game. (Photo above shows Manny showing the shirt to the crowd.) 

        Definitely, Manny’s fans do not just make up the entire Filipino nation but they come from other parts of the world as well.

        In 2011, he did not just win another boxing bout although his fans feel he has seen better fights.

        Interestingly, he likewise found himself in battles that bordered on controversy – from siding with the Catholic bishops in a campaign against the Reproductive Health (RH) Bill while wife Jinkee is quoted in a magazine that she takes the pill, and being promoted to the rank of lieutenant colonel in the Philippine Army reserve force when his former rank of senior master sergeant should have sufficed since this is the highest rank given to a non-college graduate military reservist.

        The usual “other woman” resurfaced in 2011 but his fans seem to have just let it slide, including Jinkee. There were rumors that she was going to leave him but they were just that – rumors.

        No matter these incidents, Manny remains a hero to the Filipino people. He continues to put the entire Filipino world into an exciting halt –

including crimes – each time he fights and that is something. I am touched by the way he goes down on his knees, does the Sign of the Cross after every fight; and how he dotes on his mother, Mommy D(ionisia). 

        More importantly – and unlike other celebrities and politicians – he reveals his true self in public, including the unlikeable versions of himself, with self-confidence.

No Mere Heartthrobs. The almost orgasmic shot to fame of the Azkals, the national football team, proves an important milestone in the country’s standing in the world of sports, where our only claim to fame is Manny Pacquiao.

       In response to the team’s instant popularity, forward player Phil Younghusband was quoted saying, “If they come to (our) games just to watch me take my shirt off or my brother, or anyone, if that’s an excuse for them to come and watch football, then so be it.”

        But the Azkals, in time, would prove that they are no mere heartthrobs. In the midst of the screaming girls, the men took notice as well and their sudden interest in football has nothing to do with Phil and  brother James’ abs or the other Fil-Brit players’ good looks. 

        Indeed, they can play powerful football and they have impressively put the Philippines in the international map in terms of the said sport. 

        In the home front, they have succeeded in inspiring the youth to take on the sport. The Younghusband Football Academy has been set up to hold  a series of enhancement clinics where they share their football skills.

        In between these activities, the Azkals find time to help out. At the start of 2012, they had a charity game with the Spanish team, Internacionale de Madrid, at the Rizal Memorial Stadium to raise funds for the victims of Sendong.

        No doubt, these athletic stars are a complete package, they have good hearts, too. 

Ultimate Hero. Last year’s June 19^th marked Jose Rizal’s 150^th birth anniversary. There were a lot of activities all over the country and in some parts of the world where there are Filipinos to celebrate this special occasion.

        It was not just done on the day itself but a series of events meant to honor him happened the whole year, culminating on his 115^th death anniversary on December 30^th.  

        With all these, I was sort of reintroduced to the man and I was reminded once more of his colorful life which the youth can definitely learn a lot from. I was also introduced to a new word: sesquicentennial, meaning 150 years and so JR’s birthday last year was called his sesquicentennial anniversary. Quite a big word but befitting an ultimate hero. 

A NEW BOOK on JR was launched in July last year by the Department of History of the Loyola Schools and the University Press. It was part of Ateneo de Manila University's commemoration of JR's 150th birthday. The book's author, John Nery, is  an Atenea.

       

One of the activities I got interested in was an essay-writing contest entitled If Rizal had been a blogger, what would he have blogged about? I wanted to join but the contest was only open to students aged 14 to 18 years old.

        As a blogger, JR will definitely be a hit. He would blog about the same things he wrote in his time. He will address the youth no end and make them realize they are the hope of the fatherland. He will trumpet the value of education and patriotism and love of everything Filipino.  

        He will expose wrong-doings in government the same way he did against the Spanish friars. He will call for reforms but will not initiate a revolution. He will stress that “there can be no tyrants where there are no slaves.”

        Of course, he will also reveal his romantic side and blog about his lovelife – from his innocent first love to the complicated relationships with women he would meet during his travels here and abroad. There will also be love letters and poems and the men will surely pick up a few lines from these for their own “use” to woo their love interests.

        On the overall, JR will definitely prove that action does not speak louder than his blogs.

       

Girl Power 

     

No Other Anne.       Easily my Girl of the Year is Anne Curtis.

        Ever since I was assigned to do her cover story for MOD magazine (August 2008 issue) and had the chance to meet her in person and interview her, I became a fan. It amused me no end when in an episode of ABS-CBN’s Gandang Gabi Vice late last year, she showed how she posed in that MOD cover as she and Vice Ganda spoofed the many poses she has done for various magazines.

        During the time of the interview, she has just started taping for Dyosa, an ABS-CBN fantaserye with her playing the lead role of a mermaid. 

        “Dream come true na ‘to,” she gushed as we talked to her in between takes for her underwater scenes in a secluded beach in Batangas. You see, as soon as she entered show business, it was already her heart’s desire to play the role of a mermaid and that soap gave her just that -- and more

because the mermaid can likewise fly.

That's me and Anne (above) a couple of years ago during an interview in her tent in between takes of her underwater scenes in a secluded beach in Batangas. Photo below shows us in a souvenir shot, this time she untied her hair. Photos were taken by Jhen Declaro, then editorial assistant of MOD magazine.

        The following year, I had the chance to write about her again for the magazine’s Trendsetters issue (September 2009).   In that article, I called her the goddess of reinvention.  And that remains true until today. She is never the same and that is why she is never boring.

        In 2011, she transformed herself big time. Aside from being an award-winning actress, a lovable noontime show host, and a convincing product endorser, she has become a certified singer and what’s more, she has a Platinum album and a concert at the Araneta Coliseum this January. Again, she has made another dream – which she even felt was impossible! – come true.

        Never mind if she sounds like your neighborhood Videoke queen. Besides, she has said that we should not take her singing career seriously because it’s just really for fun.

        And that makes Anne truly lovable. She is simply having fun doing what she loves and accepting whatever comes her way.  She teaches the rest of us to simply let loose and take life as it is.  

        In my interview, she has said, “I am happy and content with what I have because what I have is already a blessing.”

        No doubt, her far-from-diva voice is a blessing on its own because it was instrumental in achieving for her the status of singer and, in the process, made her fans happy. And, once more, this proves her versatility and knack for reinventing herself.    

       

Strong Babe.    My first reaction when news came out that she was pregnant was ano ba naman 'tong si Andi. But as she went public and

expressed genuine enthusiasm for the growing baby in her tummy, I sort of forgave her for her rashness.

        Andi Eigenmann didn't hide – as other stars may have done – and was practically seen in every gathering, including where there are cameras, flaunting her baby bump.

        More importantly – and this is something young girls should pick up from her experience – Andi showed her sense of responsibility when she singlehandedly decided to keep the baby.

Hot Miriam. And, oh, not to forget, Miriam Defensor-Santiago. I simply adore her when she talks because she says it like it is, no mincing of words whatsoever.

        She was worth watching and listening to in 2011 – from her tongue-in-cheek pronouncements on her 40^th wedding anniversary (“I’m not a blushing bride, I’m a veteran bride.”), and the Divorce Bill (“I think divorce should be available to people who become homicidal at the sight of each other.”); to her aplomb as she cites verses from the Bible (“The Bible does not say, ‘Go out to the world.’ It sounds very much like God is encouraging us to go out and copulate in public. God said in the Bible, ‘Go forth and multiply.’ ”), and her body English as she stresses a point or reacts to other people’s ignorance or incompetence.   

        Towards yearend, the feisty senator and law expert was elected one of the judges to the International Criminal Court (ICC) by the Assembly of States Parties. She holds the distinction of being the first Filipino as well as the first Asian to serve as ICC judge.

        This is a fitting ending to a meaningful year for Miriam. This proves that more than her quotable quotes, she is a professional and knows her craft well. So unlike others who utter

words but only manage to add to   noise pollution.

A Rogue Among The Roses

      Just so you know, she is not one of my kind of people but including her in this yearender was inspired by that bumper sticker, “If you can't be an inspiration, be a warning.”

        The “she” we are talking about is former president, now congresswoman, and presently in hospital arrest, Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo

a.k.a . The Little Girl.

        Obvious lessons to be learned from what happened to her are crime does not pay; that there is actually more to life than wanting to have everything; and that enough should be enough.

        There is no need to go into the details of the depth and breadth of her deeds and misdeeds. Let me just quote Mahatma Gandhi and may we also remember the great man’s words: “Earth provides enough to satisfy every man’s need, but not every man’s greed.”   

Love Angles

    Finally, I want to cap this quite long yearender with a beautiful love story …  

      Lola Aurelia, worried about husband Lolo Luis, who left home and hasn’t come back for a couple of days now, sets out in the city streets in  search of him. Pinned in front and at the back of her dress is a printout

photo of Lolo Luis.

        A street photographer chances upon her in some street corner and takes a photo of her. With Lola Aurelia’s permission, he posts it in his Facebook account and thousands who were touched by this black and white photo shared it until news reporters got wind of it.

        ABS-CBN’s TV Patrol sought out Lola Aurelia and was asked to give a message to Lolo Luis just in case he might be listening. She said, “umuwi ka na, magpahatid ka sa mga makahanap sa iyo.” She then tells reporters, “nag-aalala ako kung kumakain ba siya, natutulog ba siya ... maulan.”

        The waiting finally ended as some concerned citizens who recognized Lolo Luis tipped DZMM Teleradyo about seeing him and that led to the couple’s reunion.

        A very simple plot. No major stars to play out the roles. It is not a product of the TV networks' creative think tanks. It was shown not on prime time but in the news.

        For me, this is 2011's best love story yet and watching the news has never been more uplifting. Lola Aurelia is true love’s living testimony … that true love waits, finds a way, and always triumpsh.

         Celebrity couples then come to mind and how they go about their so-called relationships – complete with tears and histrionics – and I begin to wonder, what’s love got to do with it.

        So there goes 2011. The New Year is not so new anymore but we still have 300-plus days to go to do the things we want to do, pursue and achieve as well as to make up for lost time, make amends and to finally make it right.