Girl Power In The Time

SUMMER IS UPON US once more. The sun’s up, the birds visiting my front yard sing to me every morning and my chimes sound so beautiful in the afternoon breeze. Both are invitations for me to go rushing into the great outdoors.

            And the stars are always out each night and it feels good to glow in the moonlight. This is a come-on to savor what’s above and below of nature.

            Of course, the temperature has risen and we hope tempers don’t go with it.

            But before the weather people can officially proclaim it is indeed summer, typhoon Caloy brings rain to Metro Manila and neighboring areas. The typhoon was expected to hit Mindanao – which it did, unfortunately – and we in the Big City were supposed to just experience partly cloudy skies.

            On the day daughter Pee Ann posted my profile picture for summer on my Facebook account, it rained like cats and dogs. Kuya Kim explained on ABS-CBN’s TV Patrol that this was due to the hot temperature which made the clouds heavy with rain. Oh well, I thought it was the heavens’ reaction to my summer-ready (?) body …

 

        Anyway, no matter what we say, hot times are in order. The female population among my family and friends are now working towards a bikini-ready or at least a beach-friendly body. Good luck girls!

            These hot times augur well for Ciudad Christia, a resort located inside my subdivision, and people visiting it have increased giving the main street a bustling atmosphere. Resort owners even had the wall at the entrance of the subdivision painted with their signage and an inviting sun icon.

 

        Passing by it makes me think of real waves – not man-made – rushing to the shore or simply moving with the breeze. Like White Beach in Boracay, which is one of TripAdvisor’s Travelers’ Choice Awards 2014 for Top 25 Beaches in the World. It’s No. 19 and captioned: “White powdery beach sand that doesn’t get hot even at high noon, it’s amazing.”

 

        Enough about the weather because, women in the news are definitely hotter than summer and there is a lot of Girl Power going on.

TRUE COLORS

        Lupita Nyong’o hit the headlines not so much for winning the Oscars’ Best Supporting Actress for her role in 12 Years A Slave. Her acceptance speech – as the Best Breakthrough Performance at the seventh annual Black Women in Hollywood Luncheon hosted by Essence magazine – was a surefire blockbuster. Her words resonated as she put today’s beauty standards to shame and totally made skin whitening product manufacturers squirm.

        On hindsight, Lupita is no different from many young girls who pray for lighter skin to conform to beauty standards. There were a lot before her who asked not just for white beauty but something deeper like recognition and equal opportunities. They too were told that beauty is only skin-deep; the important thing is what lies within.

            But Lupita is of this generation and her words hold water to girls her age. In a speech widely documented on YouTube and other online media, she actually addressed them, hoping that her presence on screens and magazines will lead them to “feel the validation of your external beauty.” More importantly, she urged them to “also get to the deeper business of being beautiful inside … there is no shade in that beauty.”

        The most relevant excerpt of that famous speech is: “What is fundamentally beautiful is compassion, for yourself and for those around you. That kind of beauty inflames the heart and enchants the soul.”

            Checked out her Facebook page and I like the following photos. The first one is captioned: NY Staycation. Thank you, @theempirehotel for my first monogrammed gift. The second shows her with actress Rosario Dawson at the Vanity Fair Oscar party.

 

 

        I had the chance to watch her on Oscars Night and I also liked what she said when she accepted her award, “Your dreams are valid no matter the color of your skin.”

ROCKIN’ MORENA

        This talk of skin color brings me to the time MOD magazine had TV host/commercial model and endorser and – as dubbed by Women’s Health magazine – Social Media’s Darling Bianca Gonzalez in its June issue way back in 2008 and I wrote the story.

 

 

        She instantly won me over because she was such a regular no-fuss girl. She drove herself to the interview/photo shoot venue – LRI Building in Pasong Tamo, Makati City – and she was companion-less. In between the photo shoot, she commented, “morenas rock,” referring to herself, one of the flower girls, Ria, and (ahem) yours truly.

            And in the interview, she would proclaim, “I really love and enjoy being dark.”

        I want to be humble and I want to just say, she’s really the one who rocks. During the interview, I admired her more as she reveals a compassionate heart. She tells us about the Help Kids Learn Project, which she says is not an organization or a group. “It’s just a single effort, putting together other single efforts to make a big change,” she explained.

        “Children’s education is really, really my advocacy and if only I had all the money in the world, I would send all the kids in the country to school,” she added. “I know it sounds too ‘save the world’-ish but it is my dream.”

            She founded this project in the Christmas of 2005. “I am blessed to have a job that gives me good savings and also has given me, to a certain extent, recognition and so I thought doing the project was the perfect opportunity to give back,” she said.

        Her initial achievements include raising funds for a two 100-book libraries for Payatas Elementary School in Quezon City, and Batasan Elementary School in Cotabato.

            Today, she continues with this worthwhile project and in 2010 was appointed a UNICEF (United Nations Children’s Fund) Philippines Child Rights Supporter.

            Here are some souvenir shots with her – with me and her still wearing the wedding gown she wore for the cover; and going wacky with everybody, from left, make-up artist Jake Galvez, editorial assistant Charity Calderon, fashion stylist Zusette Chan; and at the back, hair stylist Buern Rodriguez.

 

 

        Bianca was the subject of refreshing news recently as she was proposed to by three-year boyfriend JC Intal.

            [Photo below is a collage of the said proposal posted in Bianca’s Facebook fanpage.]

 

        Going back to that MOD issue, Bianca was single at that time but was getting friendly once more with ex-boyfriend TV director now congressman and married, Lino Cayetano.

            We asked her what her dream wedding was and she answered: “It’s not going to be a big, big wedding and it won’t be a formal one. The reception would be fun and there will be games and production numbers. Basta super fun siya.”

            She likewise observed that, “they say less and less people are getting married now. But marriage is my dream for myself and I hope that one day I will experience it.”

            Well with JC’s proposal, her dream will soon come true – and, according to news reports, this coming December already.

GRACEFUL ADVOCATE

      Just like Bianca, my high school friend, Mirella “Merle” Gotangco-Clarete, rocks advocacy pretty well. And her family rocks as well as she gets unstinted support from them – that’s her half-kneeling, with husband Monch, dean of the School of Economics at UP (University of the Philippines) Diliman, and daughters Clarissa May and Kimberly Ann – who have taken their mom’s dancing skills and grace being both dancers. The poster-like photo was the family’s Happy Easter greetings on Mirella’s Facebook page.

 

        Merle – but I call her Mirel – believes that blessings should be shared and she doesn’t pass up any opportunity to help.

            In fact, the House of Dance (HOD) – where she is president and managing artistic director – traces its roots to her always wanting to help. This was in 2002 when her daughters’ dance teacher paid her a visit at home in BF Homes in Quezon City, where the dance company is located.

            “She was out of a job and I wanted to help her,” she recalls.  “so I opened our home for her to hold classes with seven students.”

            Word got around and the number of students increased until they could no longer use her bedroom for classes and had to move to the living room.

            “We didn't register yet because it was so informal and all charges went to the teacher,” she continues. “We joked that it was the House of Food and Dance because we always ate after a class.”

        In the meantime, her daughter Kimberly continued her dance classes elsewhere resulting in her arriving home late at night.

            “One time, she casually asked if I could just build a studio and since our enrolment was up to over 50, the teacher whom I was helping suggested the same thing,” she recalls. “To make a long story short, my small garden was transformed into a studio, courtesy of my husband, and we registered.”

            That was 2004 and a couple of years later, Merle crossed paths with one of her two daughters' former dance mentor, Sol Fernandez, who was based in Iloilo. Their conversation centered on KKK or Mga Kaibigan ng Mga Kabataang May Kanser in Iloilo, which Sol was supporting and wondered what else he could do to help them.

        “My mom, being a cancer survivor, drove home a message,” Merle says and so very like her, volunteered to help. For starters, they did four concerts in Iloilo for the benefit of the kids.

            Since then, KKK has become one of HOD’s apostolates. “We support them in whatever way we can,” she says. “I make it a point to be at their Christmas party but missed the one last year because I had a terrible asthma attack.”

            The following photos were taken during a Christmas party for the said KKK kids hosted by Jollibee in Iloilo.

 

 

        Currently, the dance company is preparing for its 10^th anniversary celebration via a concert this coming May 17^th. Entitled Tatak Pinoy, it will feature dances set to stylized and traditional original Pilipino music (OPM).   KKK is the sole beneficiary.

 

            Be part of a good cause this summer and watch the show. Just contact HOD for tickets – www.houseofdance.ph; houseofdance on Facebook; @HODPhilippines on Twitter, and the landline number indicated in the poster below –

 

        Last April 6^th, they held a 10^th Anniversary Recital entitled Myths In Motion at the Meralco Theater and Merle left the backstage to perform – together with the dance company’s Faculty – Gods, Goddesses and Villains and as shown in the photo below, she makes an awesome Maleficent.

 

 

 

 

        “I have made outreach programs an annual thing, a way to thank the Lord for all His blessings on the House of Dance,” she says. “I ask all my faculty and company to perform for this outreach, whoever the beneficiary is, and they do it wholeheartedly.”

 

            Apart from KKK, Merle has likewise helped our batch at UST (University of Santo Tomas) High School raise funds for Cottolengo Filipino, a shelter for mentally- and physically-challenged kids. [She is seen in photo below with Sonny Marquez, who was then president of our high school batch’s alumni organization, giving her a bouquet of flowers symbolizing our gratitude for staging the concert for the shelter last year.]

 

 

 

        In that concert, we, her choice (ahem …) high school friends had the opportunity to perform with her in a special number. She patiently taught us to be graceful as she is – but then again, she’s naturally graceful and we’re not ... – and made us boogie, shing-a-ling and, my favorite, chasse or sashay despite our stiff muscles and joints and our individual two left feet.

 

            In fairness, we all looked good in still photos –

 

 

 

 

        Anyway, Merle admits to be always into educating others. Her career spans 36 years of research, training and human resources development until HOD came along.

 

            On the other hand, she says that she is a perennial student. “The desire to try new things and acquire more skills is still strong, and I continuously challenge myself to be better in every way,” she adds.

 

            Most of all, Merle adheres to the phrase “in the service of the Lord.”  She says, “I think life without service to others has no meaning.  I hope that in leading by example, some of this service orientation will rub off on our teachers and students.”

TRUE GRIT

     

      Going back to the news …

            Have you met Janet Miranda?

            She is a typhoon Yolanda survivor, who gave birth recently to a baby girl by herself at the Quezon Memorial Circle (QMC).

            Reporting for TV Patrol, Carol Bonquin says that Janet – shown here right after giving birth – came to Manila with two of her children, after her husband and another child died during Yolanda’s onslaught in Tacloban.

 

        Vendors at the QMC sort of adopted the family, helping them get by every day. This is proof that one need not be rich to be able to help. Touching …

            On hand to assist Janet and her baby – whom she named Melissa –is the team from the Quezon City Department of Public Order and Safety. They took mother and child for a check-up to ensure their health.

            “ ‘Yun lang lagi ko ipinagpe-pray, makapanganak ako’ng matiwasay,” Janet revealed in the news report.

            As you can see, this Janet is a loving mother who perseveres for her children. She believes in the power of prayer. And may this Janet’s prayers be answered and may she receive the help that she is supposed to get – from government and all those coming from the rest of the world.

        There is another Janet in the news – Napoles, who else? – and it is my hope that she – together with her gang and all her cohorts – be dealt with accordingly in the court of law. She should be made to realize that – borrowing FoxCrime’s tagline on TV, “we – the Filipino people – don’t serve dessert (to people like them), only justice.”

NO GOODBYE GIRL

        Just like Janet Miranda, who would do anything for her children and that all her prayers center on them, my cousin Noemi Marquez-Fuentes would likewise fit the bill. That’s her with me during her birthday celebration last March.

 

        Her daughter, Rowena “Winnie” Fuentes-Nepomuceno, declares, “Mom is a very intelligent woman, very independent … she’s the best cook … a woman who takes care of everything for the family.”

 

 

        Sixty-three year old Noemi used to work at the United Nations and the United Methodist Global Ministries. These jobs took her to different parts of the world but these parts are not really places a tourist would want to visit.

            She was widowed at the age of 46 when husband Boy met a tragic accident. She single-handedly tackled parenthood for five children.

            Winnie, a 43-year old SAHM (stay-at-home mom) sadly adds, “Now, she is physically and emotionally dependent on us.  I will no longer taste her cooking.  No more going out for lunch with her.”

 

            She is not complaining, but Winnie now has to take care of everything for her mom – from her health and medical insurance to her bills to practically all her needs. 

 

                “Two years ago, Mom's employer told me that Mom can no longer do her job because she was having difficulty working in front of the computer and started forgetting things,” Winnie recounts. “I then took her to specialists who ran some blood work, MRI, CT scan, and tests.” Not believing the result, she opted for a second opinion, bringing Noemi to one of the best doctors and facilities in New York. 

 

            “It still came out positive and I still couldn't believe that she has Aphasia/Dementia,” she says.

 

            [Wikipedia says Aphasia or Dementia are physical diseases that affect the brain. Symptoms include memory loss, confusion and problems with speech and understanding.]

 

        “My world changed,” Winnie continues. “I didn't know what to do and asked myself how we are going to get through all this … she was only 61 years old.”

 

            Her initial thoughts were if this horrible Aphasia/Dementia is difficult for them, her children, it could even be more for their mom. “I just wish and pray that there's a cure,” she says.  "It's ‘a long journey of goodbye,’ that's what they say about this condition.”

 

        But Winnie is not your typical Goodbye Girl and refuses to dwell on the negative. In fact, she joins meaningful activities championing the cause of people with her mom’s condition as shown in the photo below.

 

 

 

        She says, “I'm holding on to what I believe in, that God has a reason for everything … I still call it a miracle or a blessing.  For what she had been through all her life, I think God just wants her to forget all the trauma, all the sadness, and all the stress.”

            She gives credit to the system in America, the support of husband Kevin, son Ken, her kuya Ronald – who’s in Manila and with whom Noemi is staying – and her other siblings, for greatly helping her in managing Noemi’s condition smoothly. Ronald is seen in photo below, -- seated, second from left and to Noemi’s right – also taken during his mom’s recent birthday celebration.

 

        “She may forget my name but what matters is, she knows in her heart that I'm her daughter,” Winnie says. “What is important is how we make her happy.”

            Noemi will surely be happy when Winnie and her siblings based in America come visit this coming July.

            Finally, Winnie has some advice to people whose loved ones have Aphasia/Dementia or Alzheimer’s Disease: “Be patient.  Give lots of love and care.  It's good for them to know that you will be with them in this journey.  It's okay to cry but be strong at the same time.  And it's okay to ask for help.  And pray ... pray a lot.”

        Meanwhile, Winnie enjoys her role as mother and wife. She and her family are members of the Filipino Rosary Group and the Filipino Choir at St. John’s Church in Goshen, New York. “I love spending time with Uncle Boyet (her mom’s brother and my favorite cousin) on some weekends, and I love food trips and going on vacation,” she says. “On top of that, I’m Mom’s long-distance caregiver.” 

 

LAID-BACK MAMA

 

      And then there’s this mom from my young circle of friends – young meaning she’s the age of my daughter Pee Ann – who enjoys being a mom, and if I may add, being a single parent.

 

        She is Ma. Luisa “Laissa” Marquez but no relation to cousin Noemi, whose maiden name is Marquez. It’s weird tho’ that Laissa’s mom is named Noemi.

 

 

 

        Anyway, Laissa calls me Mamita and with our decade-long friendship, I am witness to her colorful but not so happy-ever-after lovelife. She admits that she hasn’t really moved on from that failed relationship, declaring, “Still working on that, I never dated for seven years.”

 

            No regrets, however, because it gave her now seven-year old Nathan. Dating takes a back seat as she juggles career – she is software quality analyst in an IT (Information Technology) company – and motherhood. In between, she gets to experience the ups and downs of being single but with a son.

 

            “The good side is I still have my freedom, I could live my life and decide by myself without compromising or waiting for a partner’s decision,” she says. “The downside is there’s nobody to take care of me and my son.”

 

            Not that she needs taking care of but, of course, her son still needs a father figure.

 

            “As  single moms, we have a tendency to make our kids our life, setting aside our own personal needs and our growth, too,” she shares. But Laissa does not overdo things and is more like an older friend to her son, seven-year old Nathan.

 

 

 

        “We do simple things during our bonding moments like teaching him how to ride a bike and play games, including those games in his PS3,” she reveals. They also do household chores together and they talk a lot while doing them. “I notice that he talks more openly about his thoughts when we do things together,” she adds.

 

            For single moms out there, she has some tips: “Spend quality time with your kids while they’re young. Prepare for the time when they grow up and would develop a mind of their own and would be more independent.”

 

        She adds: “You may choose to remain single or fall in love again but give yourself time to grow, learn new things, build a strong network of friends, and do not do unplanned pregnancy.”

RESOURCEFUL MOTHERS

 

        Single mom Leny Morilao of Curves and Lines Graphics and a resident of Payatas in Quezon City gives advice through her sand art. Her words of wisdom are taken from the Bible, where she finds inspiration and strength as she fends for five children, who are all in school.

 

 

 

        I chanced upon her work – Bersikulo Sand Art Project Kit which comes with sand of different colors, a small jar of glue, sticks and a mixing bowl – and those of other women from the Second District of Quezon City – during a day-long Women’s Livelihood Product Exhibit at the Activity Center of Ever Commonwealth. This was part of the district’s Women’s Month celebration last March with a tagline Women of Character, Women of Courage.

 

 

 

 

        Aside from Leny’s sand art, other products included bags made from recycled paper by Husay Pinay -- an organization that helps women of Quezon City develop skills, enhance their creativity, and find livelihood opportunities – as well as doormats, potholders, and home-made chocolates and other sweet delicacies.

 

 

 

 

        Sand art is using different colors of sand – in Leny’s case, it is construction sand from Australia – and mixing it with glue then applying the mixture in a baseboard design. The sand hardens in time and then it is ready to adorn your walls or tables and even your desks in the office.

 

 

        Leny says that this is a perfect hobby for young boys and girls this summer. Check out Leny’s project kits and finished products in their Facebook page – curvesandlivesgraphics – and in small bookstores, including the one inside the JCSGO (Jesus Christ Saves Global Outreach) Christian Academy on 15^th Avenue in Quezon City.

 

TOUGH JUANAs

      Still on the celebration of Women’s Month last March, the Philippine Commission on Women issued a Press Statement to announce this year’s theme: Juana, Ang Tatag Mo ay Tatag Natin sa Pagbangon at Pagsulong!

            It paid tribute “to the strong and resilient Juanas who brought inspiring changes in the country and across the globe. It likewise recognized the role of women in the rehabilitation process and their overall contribution to progress.”

            At the House of Representatives, the women legislators took over the House on March 3^rd to mark International Women’s Month. Representative Gina de Venecia of Pangasinan’s Fourth District temporarily replaced House Speaker Sonny Belmonte and she got the chance to bang the gavel. Representatives Linabelle Villarica (Fourth District, Bulacan), Marlyn Primicias-Agabas and Gwendolyn Garcia were acting Deputy Speakers.

 

        The 79-strong women legislators were well-dressed for the occasion in their best Filipiniana-inspired gowns. In a Press Release issued by the House’s Public Relations and Information Bureau, the women ruled the session for one day and rooted for the speedy passing of their bills as well as promoted their individual causes through privilege speeches.

 

        Congresswoman De Venecia, who is at her second term as president of the Association of Women Legislators Foundation, Inc. (AWLFI), says, “at 79, the number of women legislators in the 16^th Congress is the biggest in history. Yet, we’re just a quarter of the total House membership. To strengthen our influence, we decided to unite, because in a world where there are many voices, it is important that the women’s voice is heard.”

            For her part, Congresswoman Villarica     gave this message on the eve of International Women’s Day: “Until we are fully represented in all decision-making aspects of our national life and violence against women is a thing of the past, let us keep on pushing for that day when International Women’s Day is no longer necessary because celebrating women’s achievements and tapping their potential is an everyday part of our national existence.”

            Well said Honorable Women of the House …

ELOQUENT RUBY

        Talking about real-life Juanas, another high school friend, Ruby Paredes-Macario is also one tough cookie.

            She is a cancer survivor and because she has a way with words, she is able to translate her experience in a hopeful and inspiring way. In the anecdotes that she drops when our high school group gets together, she mentions surviving the Big C in the likes of hurdling an Algebra problem.

            She shares the following photos with husband Rico, who is senior manager/Area Finance, Treasury-APAC of Sykes Asia, Inc. Below photo was taken seven months after her operation; and lower photo, seven years after the operation.

 

 

 

        I remember that first Christmas after she was declared C-free. She narrates how she stood crying in front of a Christmas tree in a mall because she thought she’ll never see one again. “Akala siguro nung mga nakakakita sa akin nasisiraan na ko ng bait,” she says thus ending her story with aplomb.

            Sharing her experience doesn’t draw pity but admiration.

            “God has blessed me with the gift of words and somehow, sometimes without realizing it, I have become an influence to others,” Ruby says. “I am amazed that people believe me and I'd like to call it being an instrument of joy, peace, and contentment, mouthing statements that touch the heart.”

            This serves her well as she holds a challenging job – as Executive Assistant to the President of Vitarich Corporation – and an even more challenging mission – as Vicarial Regent of San Pedro Bautista Vicariate, Diocese of Cubao of the Daughters of Mary Immaculate (DMI) as well as chairman of its Mission Thrust on Youth Welfare.

            This is the reason why when she was diagnosed with colon cancer, stage 4, her initial thoughts were -- “’Hold on a second, I have a lot of concerns to settle, in the office and in church ... I have lots of work to do!"

            In the privacy of their bedroom, Ruby and her husband cried together. “I was tempted to ask God, ‘why have You forsaken me?’ but I checked myself,” she reveals.

            She had to undergo surgery immediately and her busy world had to be put on hold. “My surgery was scheduled on the fiesta of Our Lady of Lourdes and I felt that she covered me with her mantel of protection,” she recalls. “There was an outpouring of prayers from friends in church, the office and all around me, most especially our parish priest, who anointed me twice, at Lourdes Church prior to surgery, and in the hospital after the surgery.”

            Looking back, Ruby had a “super busy” life. She worked in the office from morning till late at night and then there were meetings at the parish center to attend to. “I had so very little time left for the family,” she reveals. “Right before my eyes, I saw the hair of my boss turn from black to gray and, to my surprise – as if on auto-pilot - my children became teenagers ... I had no time for myself and especially for my sons.”

            What she found really wrong was “my work became my priority, including my hectic church activities. I say my morning prayers alright but the Lord was basically absent from my mind the rest of the day, and more often than not, I was always too tired to pray and thank Him at the end of the day.”

            Living in the present, she recalls the day after the operation: “I was kinda sad when I woke up to see that I was alive. I thought I'd come face to face na with my Maker. The experience made me realize that our life on earth is just a passing thing and something more beautiful awaits us. Each day, I look forward to that - and prepare that I'd be worthy. Medyo spiritual pero, at our age, we'd come to that stage.”

            With that, she has some advice: “Enjoy life. I almost lost it. It's God's precious gift and we should appreciate it every day. Like anything that we treasure, enrich it and share with others if you can. For a start, be a delight to be with and you'll realize how much love you'll receive.”

            And Ruby’s strength and sense of survival continues. Her granddaughter, baby Elise, was born so tiny – the size of  her grandmother’s palm – but through prayers – and I bet her grandma’s genes on her – she is now an energetic one-year old, seen here with her grandpa Rico.

 

FLEXIBLE APPLE

        Ruby’s younger version is probably my friend and business partner (thethirdpartyplanners) Apple Lopez.

            All of 31 summers, she is also a survivor of sorts. She is seen in one of the many places she loves to visit, the Pan de Amerikana in Marikina City.

 

        “It was a very difficult episode of my life when my love story ended not in your usual kind of love story ending,” she begins. “Mine was tragic which made it harder to move on and cope and back then, I thought that my life will end quickly, too because I didn’t have the intention to live anymore.”

            One fine day, she found herself attending a church service at Victory Christian Fellowship. “That particular Sunday’s preaching struck me so much that it made me want to hear more of that, making me attend the church’s service week after week,” she recalls. “It seemed like God was talking to me in every preaching, telling me to move on, saying ‘no, that's not what I planned for your life. You're destined for greatness.’ “

            Apple admits that “God is really the main reason why coping was made easier for me … if not for Him, perhaps until now I will still be doomed.”

            Today, Apple has left the corporate world and before that, magazine work – we met at MOD magazine where she was an editorial assistant (EA) – and has achieved her dream to become a preschool teacher. She likewise continues to serve the Lord as member of Victory Christian Fellowship’s Missions.

            “I liked my career then but it was becoming too much for me,” she says. “And then I volunteered in our church’s Sunday school and I discovered how I love the feeling of being a teacher.”

            She likewise admitted that she came across the blog of Patty Laurel, who left a promising career as a commercial model and TV host to become a preschool teacher. “I admired her for that and I prayed about my decision and it seemed like I’m really called to be a teacher because since the day I started teaching, I’ve never been this happy and comfortable with my career.”

            “I just love this job!” Apple says in this photo with some of the kids she teaches. “Everything is just the right fit for me.”

 

        And she uses this love for teaching in her church’s Missions. “At first, I told myself I’m not really ready for Missions,” she says, “but one preaching about reaching the nations to preach about Jesus made me decide to sign up and my life has never been the same after that.”

            She was part of the church’s mission to Indonesia last year. “I really felt the aching to share the good news about Christ because I saw a need there,” she says. “During conversations we do in our missions, we share Jesus to them and how He has changed our lives, too.”

        She puts emphasis on the fact that “our mission is not really about us but about Jesus and at the end of the day, it is still Him who will make things possible ... we are just used as instruments to the message.

            The best thing about Apple is her flexibility and her unwavering faith. She likewise knows how to enjoy life the way she knows it but at the same time, never compromising her faith and standards.

            “I am able to do the things I want because I don’t settle into just dreaming about it,” she says. “Once I want something, I make sure I make it happen.”

            In conclusion, she says, “everything is just the right fit for me.”

MAGAZINE PERSONALITIES

      Apple mentioned Patty Laurel as an important factor in her career shift. I can see how Patty became such an influence and an inspiration.

            I first met Patty when she was launched as one of four hosts in Studio 23’s morning show, Breakfast – including then boyfriend now ABS-CBN’s morning show host and news reporter Atom Araullo – and I did a feature on her. She was also a VJ on MTV Philippines at that time. The second time around, in 2011, I was assigned to write about her and this time, she was already a preschool teacher but was taken as one of the brand ambassadors of Neutrogena’s Fine Fairness Line. Both assignments were for MOD magazine.

            “Teaching has been my passion ever since I was really young and when I reached my mid-20s, I decided it’s time for me to pursue it,” she has said in that interview. “Naturally, if you’re good at a certain thing, you just stay doing it which is not a bad thing but you’ll never know what other things you’re good at if you don’t try.”

 

        In that 2011 issue, Patty was featured together with Hannah Villasis, a top beauty blogger and a Neutrogena brand ambassador, too; Atty. Agnes Devanadera, then just resigned Justice Secretary; and Margie Juico, then newly appointed chairperson of the Philippine Charity Sweepstakes Office (PCSO).

 

        I did the interview on Ms. Juico at the PICC (Philippine International Convention Center) and she was then in the middle of a controversy. “They may get me out of focus sometimes but I want my detractors to know that I believe life is so short to be concentrated on destroying somebody,” she has said in that interview. “If you are a member of the wrecking crew, now is the time to be part of the construction team.”

        A few years later, Ms. Juico continues to pursue PCSO’s mandate of uplifting the life of the Filipino people.

            She has said then, “working in a service institution makes you start counting your blessings when you see people seeking help. The job becomes rewarding because you are able to make things happen for them.”

        She continues to make things happen. Of course, PCSO was one of the government institutions who gave help to the survivors of Yolanda. Ms. Juico recently turned over a P2-million donation in check to Mayor Fritz Ezekiel Aseo of the municipality of San Julian in Eastern Samar (as shown in a photo from Tyron Rob Pangilinan’s Facebook account). This financial assistance is for the construction of 50 fishing boats for 50 fisherman beneficiaries.

 

        This summer, PCSO also donated an ambulance to the Boracay Fire Rescue Ambulance Volunteers (BFRAV), the first responders of the Boracay Action Group (BAG).

            A simple turnover ceremony was held recently with Ms. Juico handing over a symbolic key to BFRAV, led by its Chief Executive Office Commodore Leonard Tirol. Witnessing the ceremony were PCSO’s Atty. Reena Yason and Aklan Provincial Tourism Council (APTC) Vice Chair Victoria Ramos-Antonino.

 

        I met Atty. Devanadera when she guested at Bulong Pulungan, a media forum held Tuesdays at the Sofitel Philippine Plaza. This was a year after the Mindanao massacre involving the Ampatuans, which she called “a gargantuan crime.”

            She has gone back to private practice and leads a quieter life. Recalling a colorful stint in public service, she admits that she has learned to take things in stride. “I have made it a point that conflicts shouldn’t consume me,” she informed me. “I have learned not to stress myself kasi nakakapangit ‘yun.”

LEGALLY FEISTY

        I also have a lawyer who eventually became a judge among my circle of friends and that’s my after-office buddy (during our F. Jacinto Group days), Judge Leilani “Lani” Dacanay-Grimares of the Paranaque City Metropolitan Trial Court (MTC).

            She is feisty in the positive definition of the word. Not quarrelsome or belligerent but energetic and with a lot of spunk.  

        “Being a judge entitles me to a higher degree of power and pride than when I was a lawyer,” Lani says. “My son Zaak’s autism humbles me in a certain way, it keeps me grounded, and to him, and to my co-parents in his school, and co-members in the Autism Society of the Philippines-Paranaque chapter, I am not a judge but a simple mom who struggles with the difficulties of having a special child.”

 

 

        Zaak was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder when he turned two years old. This was brought to her attention by her brother who noticed Zaak to have become less attentive to his environment and his reaction and responses have decreased. Lani likewise noticed that at age one, he already started saying the words mommy and daddy and can do the bye-bye and fly-away gestures but altogether stopped doing them as if he has forgotten them. He played alone a lot, not minding the people around him.

            “But I ignored these symptoms because I thought, being the only boy, his development might just be delayed compared to her two talkative and rowdy sisters,” Lani recalls. (Zia, below photo, is a college student at the Ateneo taking up AB European Studies,  and currently in Paris with her photo taken in Amsterdam, the Netherlands; while Zela, lower photo, my inaanak, is an incoming fourth year student at Woodrose School.)

 

 

        When the symptoms were confirmed, she found it difficult to accept Zaak’s lifelong disability. “I have long wanted to have a son who will carry my surname as a lawyer and that dream may never be fulfilled,” she sadly recalls.

            But her husband Erwin – who is Logistics Manager of FINECO Corporation, a sister company of Puregold – encouraged her. “With his positivity and the understanding and support of my relatives and friends, I have accepted Zaak’s condition in due time,” she recalls. “I then wasted no time in giving him early intervention so that at the age two, he was undergoing a lot of therapy, involving his speech, behaviour and sensory functions. I also sent him to SpEd (Special Education) classes.

        Lani is proud of Zaak who has gone a long way. “I am proud of all his achievements despite his disability and he has developed self-help skills and con do things independently like a normal child his age,” she says. “He has talent for swimming, playing the piano and building puzzles, even those designed way beyond his age.”

            Lower photo shows Zaak after successfully assembling a puzzle of the Eifel Tower in Paris to let him know where his Ate Zia is.

 

        And Lani has some great advice to moms out there who has kids like Zaak.

            “God will not give us these children if we are not special in His eyes. That is why there is a saying that suwerte daw ang may special child. Love your special kids with utmost patience. They are not a burden if they are taught the basic self-help skills. Believe in guardian angels and miracles. Invest in a good caregiver who will follow up the therapy and SpEd lessons at home. I am blessed with a caregiver who is so patient with my son.”

BENCH BABE

        Back to recent headlines …

            Pretty public servant, Ormoc City Representative Lucy Torres-Gomez, has launched her The 6200: Mission Possible Project with the help of Ben Chan and the entire Bench family. [Took a photo of the poster in front of the Bench store in Trinoma]

 

        No doubt, Lucy puts her connections to good use. The project, as its name suggests, will provide 6,200 boats to the same number of fishermen of Ormoc City and nearby municipalities in the Fourth District of Leyte to enable them to restore their livelihood after Yolanda. Each boat or banca has a fiberglass hull, a Honda propeller, brass pipe, rudder, steel shaft, and cross-joint bolts, nuts and rings.

            This brings to mind, Bench’s first TV commercial which has Lucy’s husband, actor and athlete Richard Gomez rowing a boat.

            The couple is featured on the cover of Hola magazine where they talk about this project which they are mutually undertaking with a passion.

 

        In a recent interview with pep.ph, Lucy admitted Richard still takes her breath away after 15 years of marriage.

            “Yesterday, when he walked through the door from work and he was rushing in, the spark is still there,” she revealed in the interview. “When I hear the car come up the driveway and I know he’s there, the day is just better, he is still the highlight of my day.”

        Sweet … but if you’re married to somebody as hot as Richard Gomez, you’ll probably always feel that spark.

            When I was assigned to do the cover story on him for MOD’s issue on fathers a couple of years back, I was a bit distracted while interviewing him because he is really good-looking and he had such soulful eyes.  And I made sure we had a photo together …

 

PERFECT GYMNAST

      Talking about possible, in September of 2007, Nadia Comaneci came to Manila upon the invitation of Procter & Gamble Philippines. I covered the event and had the chance to post some questions in the Q & A portion. Her feature came out in that year’s October issue.

 

        One of my questions was how did it feel when she achieved a perfect 10 at the 1976 Montreal Olympics in 1976. She answered –

            “I don’t remember how I felt, but after I performed during the uneven parallel bars event where I got my first perfect 10, I got confused because the scoreboard registered 1.00 and that was not a good score. Turned out, the scoreboard was set up only until 9.95 because, according to the International Olympic Committee, nobody was capable of scoring a perfect 10. But I remember every routine I did. All those years of training taught me that the most important thing is to keep trying to be better every day. Remember all the time why you’re doing what you’re doing.”

 

        Her advice to girls who may want to be like her: “I never thought that at 14 years old, I was going to be called the greatest of all time, and I’m honored. It feels great and I hope that I can inspire kids and let them know that anything is possible. There’s no secret to achieving your dreams, really, just a lot of hard work – but work done with a lot of pleasure.”

            And just like some of my friends whose stories I’ve shared, she also believes in volunteerism and sharing: “Winning the Olympics has opened a lot of doors for me. It has also allowed me to volunteer and share my resources with others.”

            At the time that she was here, she was set to open the Nadia Comaneci Children’s Clinic in Bucharest, that houses 20 medical offices, a social canteen that will provide three meals a day for 100 children and a pharmacy with free medicines, among other facilities.

HILARIOUS NEWSMAKER

        Again, back to the news …

            Are you done laughing about Mommy Dionisia Pacquiao’s antics and posturing before, during and after the fight of her son, Manny, on Palm Sunday?

        Seeing her with a rosary and a small stampita reminded me of my mom who prayed the rosary every night and, until my sister Patty advised her not to, even during Mass. She would even go to Baclaran Church to pray – even after some heartless pickpocket has snatched her wallet.

            Mommy Jean to her grandchildren – and later on the nickname caught on with almost everybody who knew her – her prayers were her strength not just for herself but for all of us her children – she prayed for each and every one of us. Oh how she prayed for me when I was in my financially-challenged moments …

            I think mothers are strong that way. And Mommy D was no exception.

        Surely you already know what she did, praying and pointing – media called it hexing – at Manny’s opponent Timothy Bradley and then hugging him later on with the words, “sorry Bradley, it’s only boxing.” She tells Dyan Castillejo over TV Patrol, “sabi n’ya naman sa akin no prog, no prog.” But, of course, Bradley meant “no prob” as in no problem …

 

        In Gandang Gabi Vice, she had me laughing out loud as she answered Vice’s questions and danced like a hot babe with daring moves. And she was a riot when she sang Miley Cyrus’ Wrecking Ball.

 

        Well, a mom’s love is like a wrecking ball – as hard as heavy steel and that love is used to demolish problems and challenges that go their children’s way.

APRIL FOOL

      If Mommy D is outrageously funny, Kris Aquino is silly funny.

            What can you say about her short-lived KrisTek love team with Quezon City Mayor Herbert Bautista? [Photo from abs-cbnnews.com]

 

        She made me laugh with her admission on primetime TV of her now aborted “work in progress” relationship with the Mayor. The funniest part of her written statement – which she read on ABS-CBN’s Aquino & Abunda Tonight and which, she said, the Mayor helped prepare – was “please allow us our privacy para naman magkaro’n kami ng chance at forever.”

            Privacy? How come she’s announcing it on primetime TV? And wow, forever agad ?

            But when I read Ricky Lo’s column on Philippine Star, I stopped being amused. Ricky wrote that he already knew Kris and Herbert were seeing each other. In the spirit of fairness, he asked for the side of Herbert’s long-time partner, Tates.

        In the said column, Ricky revealed that the Mayor has been with Tates for 20 years with whom he has two kids and she is known as “the wind beneath Herbert’s wings,” and “the accepted First Lady of Quezon City,” but Kris allegedly called “the girl he left behind.”   

            Somebody close to Tates gave this statement and published in Ricky’s column:

            “No, Tates and Herbert are not living-in but they haven’t really broken up.  As QC First Lady, Tates knows every nook and cranny of the city, kabisado niya ang mga problema at concerns ng mga constituents. She worked hard to make Herbert achieve his political ambitions starting when he first ran for QC mayor. Like Tates, the children Athena, 18, and Harvey (who is in the cast of ABC-CBN’s Goin’ Bulilit), 10, are affected by the whole thing which they learned only from media reports. The children are thinking of going abroad. Tates refuses to make any comment.”

        Next on Ricky’s latest column, he disclosed that KrisTek didn’t progress with Herbert sort of calling off the romance. Ricky wrote that the Mayor “was forced into it, no doubt, by the unpleasant write-ups against him.”

            Well that … and probably Kris’ insinuation at forever …

            Caught Kris on her late night talk show after the long Holy Week holiday sporting a new and very short hairstyle and I think it fits her. Tito Boy commented that her hairstyle is appropriate for summer to which Kris hastened, “pag may pinagdadaanan ka, it’s appropriate.”

 

        Well, she brought herself there ... in an April dream …

GIRLS YOUNG & FREE

        Closer to home, I want to talk about my two daughters who, despite me stumbling through motherhood, have grown up to be fine and caring adults. And, with them around, Girl Power is definitely at its best in my world.

 

            This is not something I am proud of but daughters Ghiselle and Pee Ann – christened Jacklyn Ghiselle and Paulyn Angela – practically grew up in a female household as their dad and I separated when they were both in grade school. We lived with my parents for a while and my mom played a big role in rearing them at such a tender age.

 

            [Let me share some photos with my mom while she was still here on earth during a summer trip to Palawan a few years back …]

 

 

 

        This is not to say that they don’t have a good relationship with their dad Richard. In fact, they love him so much and what happened to him and me has not affected their relationship one bit. Here’s a photo of us with him taken in that scary but fun Luge ride in Singapore two years ago  …

 

 

 

        Anyway, family and close friends have heard this once too many – an old anecdote that dates back to when Pee Ann was only five years old. But let me just share it once more.

 

            Pee Ann, who was in Nursery at the Camp Aguinaldo Learning Center in Quezon City, asked me one night, “Mommy, mayaman ba tayo?” I didn’t show my surprise since she was already going to school, she must have had this kind of conversation with her fellow five-year olds.

 

            Candidly I answered, “oo anak mayaman tayo sa pagmamahal.”

 

        She would later ask the same question once or twice and she would get the same answer. Finally, she asked again but sort of rephrased the question, “Mommy, alam ko mayaman tayo sa pagmamahal pero mayaman ba tayo sa pera?”

 

        Of course, I knew all along that that was what she meant but I  wanted to make her see that richness doesn’t always equate to material wealth. That the more important things in life cannot be bought and do not have a cash equivalent. Like love and family. And I’m happy that they have learned that.

 

        Maya Angelou has this poem that I would like to dedicate to my female loved ones, most especially those I have talked about here. It’s entitled Phenomenal Woman: Four Poems Celebrating Women and here are a few excerpts –

 

Pretty women wonder where

my secret lies. I’m not cute

or built to suit a fashion model’s size.

But when I start to tell them,

they think I’m telling lies. I say,

It’s in the reach of my arms,

The span of my hips,

The stride of my step,

The curl of my lips.

It’s the fire in my eyes,

And the flash of my teeth,

The swing in my waist,

And the joy in my feet,

The bend of my hair,

The palm of my hand,

The need of my care,

I’m a woman phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman, that’s me.

           

            And there’s a song I find appropriate for all of us who practice Girl Power. It was sung by one of the characters in a recent episode of Hawaii Five-0 on cable TV. Some of the lyrics go this way –

 

Taking stock of what I have and what

I haven’t, what do I find?

The things I have will keep me satisfied.

Got no diamonds, got no pearls,

Still I think I’m a lucky girl,

            Got no silver, got no gold,

What I’ve got can’t be bought or sold

I’ve got the sun in the morning

and the moon at night.

And I’m doing alright.

 

        Lastly, here’s a quote from one of my favorite actresses, Drew Barrymore, as shared on Facebook –

 

 

        There you go, Girl Power means staying just the way we are because we’re phenomenal that way. It is also being thankful for what we have. Most of all, it is choosing happiness as a beauty regimen inside and out.